The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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