Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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