Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
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