Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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