im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Randomize
