i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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