): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
