I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize