His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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