its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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