he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
