you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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