Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
