Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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