Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
