I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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