Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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