So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize
