umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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