I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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