What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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