from now on my penis is your penis
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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