Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
We have started to decorate penises.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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