Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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