i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
