How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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