ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
