I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
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You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
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I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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