so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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