That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
