need another drink. this is the easiest way
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
So. Much. Porn.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize