Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
