butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
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