Having a random hookup so left but love u
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
