Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
