it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Randomize
