What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize