My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
