Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
