stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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