I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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