Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
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