So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize