i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
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