do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
