very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
