My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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