i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize