Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
