I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
